Joshua D. Cooke

Yesterday marked 10 years since my mom passed away. There have been a lot of memories working through my mind and heart over the past several weeks. Last night, a poem came to me as I reflected on my mom's life. I thought I would share it here. I Wonder if In Heaven The days have turned to weeks on earth, The weeks to months and years, I wonder if in Heaven though, Time really disappears. The sun rises with each morning, The moon shines with each night, I wonder if in Heaven though, There is always brilliant light. This world is ever spinning, No matter the joy or pain, I wonder if in Heaven though, There is no such thing as rain. While here on God’s great footstool, The stars shine but still are dim, I wonder if in Heaven though, They are brighter next to Him. Here in mortal frame, A separation and a fall, I wonder if in Heaven though, Through the veil you see it all. Time is ever fleeting here, Passing as a dream, Some...

Jynna Eleanore Jyn Erso I am blessed to be dad now to five daughters.  Our latest addition was born this past Friday, weighing in at 9 pounds 6 ounces and 21 inches long.  We named her Jynna Eleanore Cooke .  The responses have pretty much been universal.  “She’s beautiful!”  “She’s precious.”  “She’s perfect!”  This is followed by some combination of “Where did you come up with her name?” followed by, “How do you pronounce her name?” I am a bit of a nerd, so I will admit the truth.  I named my daughter after the character Jyn Erso from Rogue One: A Star Wars Story.  You read that right.  I named my daughter after a fictional character from a movie.  Then, we added an extra “na” to continue a family tradition we have carried where each of our children’s names end with “nna.”  My starting five now consists of Brianna, Donna, McKenna, Alaynna, and Jynna. Jynna is not a common name.  I ca...

As the new year began, I decided that I was going to step away from social media.  I removed the Facebook app from my phone, and instead added a journaling app, determined to spend more time writing in my journal over the next year than engaging with social media posts.  I felt like it was important for me to make better use of my time, and also felt strongly that in the last couple of years significant investment in social media is not good for my spirit.  I am certainly aware of its virtues, and I have made the decision over the last couple of months that I would "check in" every once in awhile, but that my own posts would be significantly limited.  I have to say, this decision has done me much good.  I have spent less time with my phone; I have been more focused on my work; I have found more productivity in my weekends; I have given even more attention to my family; I have written in my journal regularly; I have found myself being spiritually fed on a more r...

This past weekend was a long weekend.  There has been a lot of uncertainty and nervousness.  My nerves have been frayed and my stomach has been in knots.  I haven't slept, and the anticipation on the 4th of July admittedly overtook much of my holiday.  I haven't been on a twitter feed like that EVER.  All of this anxiety and worry over a basketball player, a man I have never met and probably never will.  All of this sweat and even tears over someone playing a game for a job, and quite honestly, changing his job because he has a right too.  Some call me unreasonable.  Some say insane.  I have to quit whining and get a life.  It's not worth fretting over or being upset about.  It is irrational.  In some ways, people are right, it is unreasonable. I need to move on.  Another truth is important as well though, and that truth will explain why Gordon Hayward's decision to go to Boston is so impactful to me. I love the Utah...

The following is the tribute I gave to my Grandma Elia at her memorial service on February 1, 2017, including the poem I wrote in her memory. I love my Grandma Elia.  She will always have a special place in my heart and my memories of her are truly joyful.  Grandma came into my life as a young boy.  I spent a lot of time with Grandpa Paul and Grandma Elia.  We had a lot of wonderful weekends together.  Grandma made a choice very early in my relationship with her, and that is that she was my grandma and I was her grandson.  She did that same for my brothers and sister.  You would never know in any way that we were not related by blood, except she was very clearly Mexican and we were very clearly white!  It was the one difference she was always sure to highlight.  She encouraged me to find a nice Mexican girl who spoke Spanish.  She ended up more than okay with my white blonde-haired choice too. Grandma had a quick wit and a wi...

As I embarked on the beginnings of my career as a mental health and substance abuse counselor I had a pretty good idea about what I wanted to do and who I wanted to help.  The long and short of it is that it didn't matter to me who my clients were as long as they were adults.  No teenagers, and no children.  I would leave that population to someone else.  After hearing some of the experiences of my graduate school cohort members and co-workers during my internship site, I felt like my choice to work with only adults was reinforced. Alas, opportunity knocked, and I had to answer the call.  I was given the opportunity to run the adolescent program at my work site, and I jumped at the chance.  I admit that my intentions were slightly selfish.  Graduation was only months away, and I needed to have some beginnings of a way to support my family.  At the same time, I dove into the position with plenty of ideas and grand intentions to make big changes....

When I started this blog nearly two years ago, my initial purpose was to create a space where I could both share my thoughts and also provide readers with some understanding about the direction I had decided to take with my writing projects.  I will be the first to admit that I have not been at all consistent in posting, and there has been much that has changed in my life in terms of priorities and circumstances since I began this blog. I haven't been particularly consistent with my writing projects either, which made it difficult for me to make any firm commitments there. The reality is, I have not allowed myself the time or the space to be consistent, and as such my entries have been rather bare. Then there is the question of boundaries. How much do I really want to share? What do I want out there forever? Once I post it, it's not going away. What do I keep to myself and what do I want to share with others? Who do I even want reading these posts in the first place?  How is...

Let's get something straight right away.  When I was around two years old or so, it was discovered I had a hearing impairment.  I was fitted with hearing aids and have dealt with the implications of this fact my entire life.  For all we know, my hearing impairment is simply a result of a premature birth and the all-out efforts to keep me alive.  The way I see it, when one looks at pictures of myself looking nothing short of a crazy science experiment at birth, I consider myself quite blessed to have come out of it all with nothing a few scars and a hearing impairment to show for it. Now, in many ways growing up with a hearing impairment was not easy.  First of all, I was and still am extremely stubborn when it comes to wearing my hearing aids.  It's not like those things fit in your ear like a glove on your hand.  They are uncomfortable and annoying.  They rub against the inside of you ear at times and makes them itchy and sore.  There were...

I was recently reminded that I have been remiss in writing in this blog over the past couple of months.  Between that reminder and yet another reminder of the realities of life, it's important for me to put some things down here and I hope that I can once again grab the attention of my readers.  Forgive my absensce. This post is not an easy one for me to write.  I have had a lot of thoughts over the past couple of days, and I really don't know how they are going to come together.  I do know this though.  It is fully my intention to write this post both as a tribute and as a reminder.  I write this post from my perspective and my perspective only.  I am not going to sit here and pretend to understand all the facts and circumstances, and at the same time I am not going to skirt around the truth either as I see it.  I am an individual who has become extremely familiar with hindsight, and I wouldn't be surprised if much of what I write here ...

I recognize that I have been remiss in writing the past few weeks.  I will use the simple excuse that I have been busy.  What can I say?  I'm in a Master's program that runs on the quarter system.  It makes for some pretty intense scheduling.  I have had some thoughts going through my head though, and would like to take the time to share them here.  As you can see, it's an entire conglameration of thoughts, so we will see whee it takes me. My family and I moved from Utah to Ashland Oregon at the end of July.  We have been here for several months now and it really has become home to us.  The weather has been awesome.  We are just now getting into the rainy season.  Up until three weeks ago we have had nothing but blue sky and sunshine.  This has made for some great times.  There has been a lot of family walks, trips to Lithia Park, one of the most gorgeous parks I have ever seen, and plenty of bike rides.  I have come to ...

The theme of loss keeps hitting myself and my family.  There doesn't seem to be any end in sight.  We are all to familiar and used to the sting of loss.  Fifteen years ago my brother brought home the greatest birthday gift he ever received.  He was a faithful Alaskan Malamute puppy we called "Malone," after NBA great Karl Malone.  He has been the greatest and most faithful companion any boy and family could have.  Of course, I think nearly everyone says that about their dog, but Malone was special.  Today, Malone passed away after fifteen faithful years.  His old body finally got tired one last time.  We love him and miss him so much, perhaps none more so than my brother.  Over the past several years, I have written poems and eulogies for nearly every one of my family members that have passed away.  Today, the need and desire to do so was no different.  What follows is a new poem in memory of our faithful friend and companion M...